It's Official

Well, there is no going back now. Nik and I are official home owners! Two words come to mind right now. Holy shit. That's about all I got. I'm pretty numb at this point. There has been a constant war between my emotions all morning. First, was obvious delight. Nik and I finally have the opportunity to create our home, can life be any more beautiful? Wonder is another frequent emotion, how can two people in their mid-twenties be so fortunate? Happiness, elation, giddiness; these are all other positive emotions that have been jumping around inside my stomach for the last six hours.

However, there is also a really weird sense of guilt. I'm not supposed to be doing this without Nik, that's just wrong. He is my partner through everything that I do. I feel like I just went on a spending spree and charged six figures worth of stuff onto our credit card behind Nik's back. Not just stuff, more like hundreds of thousands of dollars on shoes and now Nik is going to be pissed! He really hates it when I buy shoes since I already own somewhere around 60 pairs. I know this feeling is slightly ridiculous, after all Nik and I do not make large purchases without consulting each other, especially a purchase to the magnitude of a real life house. I just can't help it, it felt like something vital was missing the whole time, something in addition to my heart.

Now I just have to wait for the call to come in announcing when I can pick up the keys. After that, it's on. I will transform from relatively calm and sweet natured Brittney to psycho-obsessive-compulsive-have-to-take-care-of-everything-and-make-it-perfect-before-my-husband-gets-home Brittney. I may lose some friends and quite possibly the love from my family, I can only pray that will not occur. Cross your fingers for me over the next few weeks, I will need all the support I can get.